


Match

by justanothermaniac



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: AU, Brotherly Love, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Unhealthy Relationships, could be twincest if you squint, i'm probably gonna use this tag a lot, they still deserve better
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-17
Updated: 2019-06-17
Packaged: 2020-05-13 17:58:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19256293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justanothermaniac/pseuds/justanothermaniac
Summary: They're twins. They're one and the same. They should look one and the same. If Jeremiah can't protect Jerome from the abuse, the least he can do is match.





	Match

**Author's Note:**

> Sooo, since my first fic on here is really depressing, I wanted to post something just sliiightly less depressing this time. Behold, what I call the "Wholesome AU".
> 
> What the hell is wholesome about it, you ask? Well, Jerome and Miah grow up together in the circus, but instead of resenting each other for whatever reason, they're actually inseparable. You know...like they SHOULD BE AS TWINS.
> 
> I always imagined that Jerome is the one who takes all of the physical abuse, and Jeremiah feeling endlessly guilty about it. Jerome doesn't mind that much (wow, that sounds fucked up given the context) as long Jeremiah doesn't get hurt, but Jeremiah absolutely hates it all and feels like a coward for letting his brother get hurt. It's beautifully heartbreaking, don't ya think? I do. God, I suck.
> 
> Once again, sorry for any grammatical errors or somewhat weird wording, English isn't my first language and I'm still trying to learn, Yada Yada Yada, you don't care, I know. 
> 
> By the way, yes, the title is very creative. I'll be honest, I've been thinking about a fitting title for over an hour and I just couldn't come up with anything, so here we are lmao
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy it! Much love! 💙
> 
> \- JAM

Jerome is silent while wrapping the bandage around Jeremiah's hand. He's gentle but strangely still. His movements seem robotic.

Jeremiah's stomach twists anxiously and he gulps. "Jerome?", he asks, his voice barely above a whisper. The older twin doesn't answer. "I'm sorry", Jeremiah continues, trying his hardest not to fidget. "I thought if I matched it-" "This is the dumbest thing you've _ever_ done."

Jerome's voice is cold. Jeremiah's heart clenches painfully and he squeezes his eyes shut. "I don't care what you were thinking. There's..." He's done with the bandage and immediately gets to his feet. Jeremiah follows him with his eyes but Jerome is turning his back towards the younger twin. His shoulders are shaking. "You stupid fucking _idiot."_

Jeremiah winces and feels his eyes prickle with tears at the harsh words and tone. Jerome punches the wall with a snarl before turning around again. The look on his face is one of pure rage but his eyes don't match. They're sad. "If I could I'd fucking slap you for this", he presses out and Jeremiah drops his gaze to his bandaged hand. He still feels his flesh fizzle and burn hot.

"I had to", he whispers, slowly wriggling his fingers, feeling the strain of the bandage and the throb of his abused skin. "I had to do _something."_ "Then write a fucking poem or go slice up some stray dogs!" Jerome is breathing harshly through his nose now. "You put", he grits out, his body shaking more and more with every word, "your _hand_ in a pot of _boiling soup."_

Jeremiah swallows thickly and stands up from the bed. His legs are shaky. "I had-!" _"Bullshit, Jeremiah!",_ Jerome yells, making the younger twin flinch hard. The use of his full name out of Jerome's mouth feels like a punch to the face. "You had to _match_ the scars on my hand? Did you even think this through at fucking _all?"_

"Yes." Jeremiah did think it through. Every time Jerome's scarred fingers wrapped around his own or threaded through his hair or caressed his cheek, Jeremiah thought about it. He'd look at his own hand, pale, freckled and free of scars. It filled him with rage, pain, _guilt._ Their hands were a constant reminder of the imbalance in their lives, of Jerome taking all of the abuse, of Jeremiah failing him as a brother, as a _twin._ Jeremiah had no choice.

They're twins. They're one and the same. They should look one and the same. If Jeremiah can't protect Jerome from the abuse, the least he can do is _match._

Jerome backs away when Jeremiah takes a step closer and the younger twin can feel his heart break within his chest. "You didn't", the older twin whispers then, shaking his head slowly. "Cuz if you really thought about it, you wouldn't have done it. Because you know that it's the last fucking thing I'd ever want for you."

Jeremiah is letting the tears fall freely now. He hates this. He hates that he made Jerome sad, that he hurt him. He hates that Jerome is angry with him. He just wanted to share the pain but instead, he inflicted even more of it on his other half. He lifts his arms, indicating he wants a hug but Jerome growls in frustration, clawing at his own hair. "Fucking hell, _no,"_ he hisses and the words sting, they really do. Jeremiah feels like someone put his heart in a blender. Jerome has never rejected him before. "Don't even try, I'm fucking pissed, Miah. I'm pissed and hurt and I refuse to-!"

A small, broken sob sounds from deep inside Jeremiah, a sob that is so full of agony it makes Jerome cut himself off. He looks at the younger twin and his gaze softens ever so slightly before hardening again. He's fighting an internal battle and losing. "Fuck...", he finally gasps, taking a step towards his brother. "Miah, c'mere." Jerome's arms are around him in an instant and Jeremiah cries against his neck, his uninjured hand clinging to the back of Jerome's shirt. He cuddles as close as he can, waiting for the contact to mend his heart together.

It doesn't. Jerome isn't stiff or distant but the younger twin can feel his resentment in his own stomach. He's hurt beyond belief. "Don't hate me..!", Jeremiah whispers, his voice muffled by Jerome's skin. "Please don't hate me..!" The older twin runs a hand up and down Jeremiah's back, the other curls in his hair. "I'm angry", he says, his lips right next to Jeremiah's ear. "I love you more than you could ever comprehend but I'm fucking _angry,_ Jeremiah." Jerome's hold around the younger twin tightens. "Do you understand that?"

Jeremiah gives a small nod, face still pressed against Jerome's neck and the older twin kisses his temple, his lips lingering. Jeremiah does understand. He feels Jerome's love inside and out, a warm tingle in his stomach, a safe blanket around him. "Don't do that again." Jerome's voice sounds too meek, too shaky. He's pleading. _Jerome doesn't plead._ "Please. Baby brother, Miah, don't ever hurt yourself again. It kills me. The thought alone kills me. You want that?"

It's a cruel thing to even suggest but Jeremiah knows Jerome is doing it on purpose. The younger twin hurts all over, his heart is writhing in anguish and he knows that's exactly what Jerome is aiming for. It's what Jerome needs to do. If there's one thing that Jeremiah hates more than someone else hurting his brother, it's himself being responsible for hurting his brother. "I'd never want to hurt you", he whimpers, pressing impossibly closer to Jerome, feeling his knees start to grow weak. "I'm so sorry, I won't do it again, I promise!"

His knees do buckle then and Jerome slowly sinks to the floor with him, pulling the younger twin into his lap. Jerome cradles Jeremiah like a mother would her child, he's been doing that for the past fourteen years. It shouldn't feel so familiar. They shouldn't have to comfort each other like this, not to this extent. It's a physical manifestation of how alone they really are in this world, two broken boys that only ever knew each other's love, two brothers that took the role of parent for the other, twins that shared one heart.

Jerome is showering Jeremiah's face with kisses. "I love you, Miah", he whispers, his voice too shaky. Jeremiah hates that he's responsible for it. "I love you so much. You're my dearest possession, don't hurt yourself. You're only hurting me."

 _Dearest possession._ It's a strange thing to say about another human being, most people would consider it unhealthy, wrong. But to Jeremiah, those words out of Jerome's mouth are like a balm for his abused soul. He belongs to Jerome and Jerome belongs to him. They feel too much for each other, they feel _everything_ for each other, love, warmth, trust, dependance, mine _mine mine mine mine mine._ Jerome is the one who holds Jeremiah when he cries. Jeremiah is the one who patches Jerome up after their mother and uncle let their rage out on him. Jerome makes sure Jeremiah eats. Jeremiah holds Jerome's hand when he's sick.

It was bound to happen from the start. "Mine", Jeremiah hears himself whisper, cracking his eyes open to look at his brother with adoration. "Mine, my Jerome, _mine."_ He doesn't know why he feels the need to say it. He wants to scream it off the rooftops, _Jerome is mine and I am Jerome's._ The older twin bumps his nose against Jeremiah's. "Your Jerome", he assures, his thumbs rubbing over his baby brother's cheekbones, "Your Jerome and my Jeremiah. Mine. You're _mine."_ "Yours", Jeremiah breathes out, the trembling of his body subsiding ever so slightly. "Forgive me, Jerome, please. I'll never hurt myself again. I'll never hurt _you_ again." Jerome shushes him softly. "I know. I know, Miah and of course I forgive you."

When they go to bed that night, Jerome can't stop kissing Jeremiah's face, his neck, his shoulder. _Mine,_ he whispers while doing so, _all mine, only mine, my baby brother, my MIAH._ Jeremiah has never felt more like he belongs. He's grasping the front of Jerome's shirt with his uninjured hand, afraid someone might take him away. Not that he'd let them. Anyone that dared to try would suffer a most painful death. They're as close as they can possibly be when they finally drift off to sleep. It's an uneasy one but those are ordinary. What matters is that when they wake up, they're together. Jerome presses his lips to Jeremiah's forehead and Jeremiah nuzzles Jerome's neck. They don't get up for a long time, they just hold each other, remind each other of what matters.

_Only them._


End file.
